-Party time!!

So I had my birthday party.. All the people I wanted there came :)<3 haha..
&& the speghetti was amazing (as always). I even put a dress on a curled my hair (but since it was straight the curl wouldn't stay.. lamo)

It was the best, I got money and this lotion and perfume I have been dying for!! Haha, both my grandma's got me the same bday card (unitentionally). I thought it was so cute!!!

I took the cutest picture of T & Clayton on my dad's tractor. My boys hahahahahah jkjkjk... I'll post it when I get it back !

Well I'm so tired and I have school tomorrow.
Later!

It's my Party...

&& I'll cry if I want too...

Okay, so I'm not going to cry but I am having a party tonight. One of those parties where you get down, drink, dance... spend time with family, eat mom's speghetti, and laugh till your sides hurt!!

Because..... It's my 18th birthday!

So one of the first things I did was buy a pack of "basic lights in a box". I do not smoke, so please don't think I do. I think it's gross and smells bad, hahaha. I got them for someone else.

Tonight mom is fixing speghetti (yum) && My family is coming over.. The whole family!
Mawmaw
Emily (cousin)
Nanny
Chad (brother)
Nikki (brother's wife)
Johanna (my neice in the womb)
Clayton (my nerdy nephew haha)
Andrew (brother)
Trish (brother's girlfriend)
Tonya (my other mother)
David (my other dad)
Tyler (<3>
Austin (my other brother)
Callie (consider her my little sister)

I'm not having the traditional cherry cheese cake. I'm branching out and having chocolate cake with chocolate icing (the only kind of cake I like) with a big glass of milk! :)
Well I have to go decorate and whatnot...

-News

We had news today in our house. Chad & Nikki got their results for their test (Idk what it's called) but the results were pretty bad. They are having a girl (just like I said), they are naming her Johanna Raye Carswell (ain't it cute?). She has Edward's Syndrome. You will have to Google it because I can't describe it in justice because I get confused and whatnot.

Our family (including the Carr's) are having a rough time with this. Well I'm sure they are because I sort of am. But I figured something out: I know Chad and Nikki have been researching this and talking to doctors but I have been reading the Bible and talking to the one who raises the sun up in the morning. & I know that he can do absolutely anything. Faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains.

I also found this quote today that made me feel better about the whole thing.. No matter what happens:

"Every child... no matter how fragile their life or brief their days, forever changes our world." ~Victoria Miller, Founder, Trisomy 18 Foundation.

God's in control no matter what and I promised Him no matter how hard it might be I would praise Him. && I would never break a promise to God.

------------------------------

On a better note, my 18th birthday is tomorrow. I don't want anything physically I want things that are for others well and for myself too. Ya know? I can't explain it haha..

Well.. I'm off to bed. Then when I wake up, I'll be a legal adult! Muahhahaaha!

-Okay

So the coming stopped. Well to me. I'm in a slump. && it doesn't feel good. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I don't want to talk about it.

-Life.

I'm just so happy.. with my life in general, it is just amazing. I know I over analyze things and I'm probably getting my hopes up on everything but I will take the defeat later. The heartbreak will come I'm sure but I'll deal with it then. Because I'm just so happy.

Idk where that came from but I said it.

At this moment I'm in my lunch period and as always I'm spending it in the media center. I sound like a nerd but I'm really not. I just rather be in here enjoying the peace and quiet...

So my birthday is Thursday and I'm not excited really but I'm glad (&& thankful) that I get to turn 18. It's a big deal but then again I'm anxious in a sense because I rather be 16 again and not grow up. But it comes and that's what happens I'll move on no matter what my fears are. I'm just upset that I don't know what I want to do with my life :/

It will be okay though..
My life is in God's hands no matter what happens, I will trust in Him as I have always done.

The bell summens me back to English 12/Senior Project... Yippee!! Haha;

It just keeps coming..

This dream I have in my head it's like it's a dream. Everything I want just keeps getting closer and closer. Crazy, huh? "Good things come to those who wait"
Who made that saying up anyways? Whomever was a smart person :)

I can't repeat what I found out :) Because I can't but Nikki will be getting an email shortly on what that is. But she can't tell Chad unless he promises "cross my heart and hope to die stick a needle in my eye" (another smart person)..

I just love my life. God is so good. My hearts desires are being answered. Slowly but surely. Praise Him!

I love T's dad.
Oh & I thank Joan for praying :) haha

Mom said Chad was waiting... (Your computer might combust)

I promise you I will upload more later. haha, Nikki I have like an hour of stories to tell you :) haha.. because I can't type it all on here. Oh btw: I didn't get home till 2:30 am. I was like "wow" hahaha...

Tyler walked me to the door and everything.
I love my life:)
I have more pictures than this but there are so many, I think I put some twice.
But we all know I'm sure which one my favorite is!!
I can't believe it's here and gone just like that haha..

We took T to the clearing on Burkemont Mountain because he didn't know there was a view like that so we took pictures. You can't see them lights good just the prison mostly. But it was so beautiful. He was amazed haha..

Chad, I think he beat you on the goodlookingness. That's why you didn't get a call hahaha.. he was so handsome and just to ease your mind he was a perfect gentlemen to your little sister:)

Prom Day!!

Still nervous.. hahaha

Thanks for the comments on my blog from last night from Joan, Donna, & Nikki :)
Those words were nice and Nikki you are exactly right !!
All of you were.


Well, Gotta go get this stuff done!!

Nervous...

I'm getting sortah nervous about getting all dressed up in front of T. I know, I know it seems dumb to me too. However, I have known the boy my whole entire life (well for 8 years but it seems longer) and I'm nervous now. He has seen me from my bathingsuit, sunday dress, pj's... he's seen it all, so why am I so nervous?

If someone knows the answer to that, enlighten me.

Also I turn 18 this coming Thursday (tear). I remember getting excited about 16. Anyways, the big thing is I am going to become an official member of McDowell Church. Well I'm thinking and praying on it. I'm just nervous to get in front of all of those people .. EEP! haha..

It is really later, I think I should get in the bed. I have a big day with prom and everything :)
Still nervous..
Like I have the whole butterflies in my tummy thing. Awkward since I'm 17. I don't get those alot.

&& when you smile that smile...

My world turns upside down, whenever you come around.
Hm, I'm listening to a little Vince Gill :)

Got home a little while ago from Tri-M inductions.
I'm in a music honor soceity.. how cool is that?
I think it's neat I'll graduate with a pink cord or tassel..
Neat, huh?

Well...
speaking of graduation.........
This June :) I got my cap and gown today!

I went with "T" to get his vest and tie. He was dead set on Benjamins (most expensive store in town). So we went there....... $70 dang dollars to get a vest and tie. So his mom was like "no" hhaa.
She went to Hickory and got him a black shirt yay!! and a tie that matches my dress. I don't care what he wears. He is still going to look good (to me).
black suit, black tie, purpleisredwinecolored tie . ahha

well i'ma go get some stuff done.. bye :)

Events..

So I am so very excited!! Prom is this weekend. && to begin this blog I am getting picked up tomorrow early from school (12:30) by Tyler to go get his vest. This excites me. If you know me, you would understand.

This is my dress. I think it's prettier in person.

Hair for prom. We fixed it today. I will have more product in on the actual day so that it will be more curly.

this is the back (obviously)

this is the front (obviously).
Look at that nasty cold sore... It hurts so bad. But it's getting way better. Day by day! Thank the Lord.


I ask that you pray for my brother Chad and his wife, Nikki. You can read the story at her blog http://chadandnikki.blogspot.com/ . She can explain it oh so much better than I can. I just know the gist. However, I know that God works miracles, I have seen them all around me!

No matter what we will praise Him. I already promised.

My Clayton.

I know plenty of other people would say.. "He's my Clayton".. Haha but I love him so much! My life has been so busy these days.. When he's at my house I don't get a chance to see him all that much. It bothers me. But it makes it even better when I do get to be with him because then he ignores others in the room and becomes by buddy :) haha...

Mom asked him one day "Why do you love James so much?" ha...

Okay.. Haha.. I'm have seperaton anxiety from my buddy. For real. It's serious. Ha;

Well today was fun. I went to The Jaynes house and we were suppose to have Bible Study but we just never got to it. So we set up the Badmitten (sp?) net and played. It was the first time that I have ever played this game. Lets say I would never make it professionally. Tyler and I were on a team. It took us forever to serve because we kept making up new ways to serve it. It was so much fun though. We played against David (Ty's dad) and Austin (Ty's brother). We lost. But it was fun. Haha.... I had a few good shots!

Welp, I'm getting better from my sickness yay.. I woke up Sunday, however, with a cold sore. Prom is Saturday. So I ran to WallyWorld and got me some:::

Stuff worked miracles in my life. Plus I popped it with a needle... Equals OUCH!!!!!!!! Haha... I will never do that again. That little tube is expensive stuff!! $16.72.. What??!? My parents must really love me.

So prom is this weekend :) yay!! Hha....
I'm going to go write in my journal.

Garden

So we started our garden today. Normally I would not be so happy about this. Haha, but we didn't begin planting in the blazing sun, we started in the cool of the evening and even though I'm really tired right now it was actually fun to me. Today. haha, The next time I go out there I will probably hate it. However, for some reason today I liked it. I got on my "dirty" jeans and a tanktop. I sat in the dirt and planted plants. Literally sat in the dirt haha, you should see those jeans!

I also got a picture of my daddy that I love so much. && I'll treasure it forever.

He asked me where I learnt to plant a garden.... I told him I learned from the best :] I really did.

That tractor is so old. My, late, Great Uncle Eb used to use it in his garden. It was backfiring and stuff. But my dad was having fun.

I'm just so surprised at how much I had fun today doing that. I hope it's like that everytime :)

I have been fighting getting sick because prom is this weekend and all. But my throat is hurting really bad right now and I'm losing my voice "/ Haha, welp I guess I just can't talk as much. Some people might take that as a blessing!

Clayton Enjoyed Himself...

This was so worldess. I just love him.

12:34 a.m.

It is 12:34 a.m. and I just got home. && my the 'rents didn't yell at me. Score! Haha,
I went out to the movies and stuff with my friends tonight. It was so fun.
Me, Kory, Christina, Tyler, Hailey, & Aryan.
It was fun.
Because I haven't seen Kory & Hailey in a while.
It was an excuse to hang out with Tyler.....
I have never met Christina and we talk all the time.
&& I haven't seen Aryan in two years since he joined the Navy.

It was so fun. && I would like to do that more often.

Mom is fussing to get in the bed.
G'Night...

Gastonian fun..ha

Is Gastonian a word?? If so I'm not even Gastonian. I'm Morgantian... Idk but I had the most fun in Gastonia, North Carolina tonight.

Since me and my mother have been on an excursion to find a prom dress (so difficult) because I'm the girl that is like "I will know it's it when I try the thing on" and my mom is the one who says "Just get a dress Jamie Lynn". I also had a $100 dollar budget *cough* "I don't know what the price was mom, "they" ripped the tag off". That was my line...I gave in to the motherly guilt trip.......... I'm sorry Nikki please forgive me :/ It's the eyes, I promise. Plus it's not like she can make me take it back, I ripped the tags all off :)!! Hahaha... Also she can't make me take back a dress that she cried when I walked out of my room. I will post pictures as soon as I get some.

Next stop my date's vest. So, I'm going to have to go to Hickory with him to get it because, bless his heart, he is color blind and he will either think the color is black, blue, or Idk he might surprise me because it's shimmery" hahaha... Gotta love him. Indeed, I do<3

Anyways...Nikki is the hero of the night. We decided to take a trip to Texas Road House where I had never eaten before (when I'm with them I eat places I have never eaten before, but I think it's awesome). So we are seated, just got our food. && THEN (have to get dramatic) there is this commotion across this little barrier/wall thing. Amy (Nikki's other sisinlaw) thinks someone is fighting. I think someone is having a heartattack. && I panic when things like this happen. But Super Nikki :] takes control (because she's trained, might I add). Someone yells "himelic" (sp?)... This is when Nikki takes control. One minutes she is sitting at the table and the next minute she is gone and has gone across the floor doing her thing. Then the woman bless her heart was scared to death. Anyways, Nikki saved the night! Then Clayton got scared because Mommy got involved and he didn't understand.

He was such a good boy tonight.
God has blessed me so much.
I'm thankful for the Carr's, and Chad & Nikki.
(Later on I figured out my big brother was looking out for what his sister wanted)...
I just love him!!

No words needed.

I need to do this...

I need to vent. Severely right now. I don't care who reads this and if they like it. I'm going to say how I feel. Because I'm tired of being the girl who is so humble. I let people run over me because I rather see them happy even if it takes me down. I like being humble, yes, and I'm thankful for that trait. Because if I always said how I felt, I would have a lot of people not like me.

God forgive me, again, for being so bitter.

There are a select few at church that I don't know why they come. Really.. I cried tonight because they distract me so bad from God. I couldn't tell you what the general message Richie was preaching was about. I can tell you some of it and where he read from but that's all. They sit in front of me and text, pop bubbles, talk, giggle, pass notes. && no, my readers they are not children they are in highschool. Sometimes I feel like I'm just too mature for highschoolers... These are the times I wish I went to Burke Middle College. I should have. I really should have.

Then when I started crying...emotions started surfacing that I always push back. I keep hid away. I have like one of my best friends for 8 years (I know long time, it's one of those "since we were kids" stories)... && I have never told him or anything (if he don't know by now though he's a little slower, for lack of a better word...haha). We are getting so close our senior year in highschool but as I look forward as close as we are getting our lives are going in completely different directions. Not just that though, other things are bothering me to. Stuff I don't feel necessary to spill out on the World Wide Web.

Thank you for listening if you read it.
It means a lot. Well sortah. If you have anything to say just tell me.
Any solutions will be accepted at this time :]

This girl is 14..

&& It she's amazing. Listen to her sing
"Amazing Grace"

Only 4 days...

Only 4 days till...spring break, sleeping time, and I get to meet my best cousin's girlfriend. She's one of my very best friends and I have never had the wonderful pleasure of meeting her....

Oh & this weekend.. I get to go prom dress shopping with my best sisterinlaw :] !! I went this past weekend and I tried on this dress that just about fit perfect. It was amazing and I fell in love with it. I cried..Because I have honestly never felt that pretty in my life. && then I cried harder because I couldn't get it because it was $279.00 :[

It was only so expensive because I have to have a ball gown type dress because I have big hips. I'll admit it... I'm a big (beautiful ??) girl.. && I need a dress that flatters me. So I try on this Evening gown (great at the top) hideous at the bottom. && the sales lady says "that looks so good on you". I mean I know they are there to sale the dresses but they should seriously be honest. For real.

But I did fall in love with that dress. I wish I would have taken a picture. For real, so you could see it. I think I would sell every piece of my clothing to buy that dress. I would wear it everyday. Okay, I'm done. I wish I was rich though. :]

Have a great day!!

I am Nothing by Jeremy Camp

You have to listen to this song. It is absolutely amazing!!
(Nikki I figured out how to put videos on Blogger :])

I would love to sing this song in church if I could.


Here is someone singing it:

OUCH!

Have y'all ever had the pleasure of kicking a sewing machine?? Just wondering.. I needed someone's number out of my ipod and well I jumped up to find it and my foot apparentally lost friction on the floor and kicked this :
That's the culprit... My Great Grandmother's sewing machine. Now, I have chipped nail polish and my toe is throbbing. It's a great feeling really.. (Sarcasm)! Haha, just thought I would share that with you.

I must clean my room before Trish gets here. It is now slowly inching my way past 12:46 in the p.m. and she gets of at 2:00. I'll get there. Tonight we are going to Winkler's Grove Baptist Church in Hickory NC (http://www.winklersgrove.org/) to see their Easter drama. It's awesome, our youth goes every year and it's never less than one of the best blessings.

Well I shall go on my cleaning frinzey....
Have a blessed day!

Statement of Purpose...

Ha, this is not a statement of purpose. I just looked down at my english homework... and there you go.

I have a slight problem. Prom is around 23 days away and I don't have a dress. I mean I could wear my maid of honor dress but I put it on last night and looked in the mirror... Not cute for prom.. Not cute.

Hahahaha, But it's okay I'll find something. I know what I want, and I found it on Ebay for 99 dollars.. but I don't have time for it to be shipped to me :[

Isn't it beautiful? It's like my dream hahaha. I swear.. I hope I can find one somewhat similar to that somewhere...

Have y'all ever heard of mall cop?? If not it is the funnest game on www.shockwave.com that I have ever played. You have to check it out..it's made off the movie.....

http://www.shockwave.com/gamelanding/mallcop.jsp

Click it.. it will be the best decision you have ever made in your life. Well not really.. But when I'm bored at school that is how I pass my time away and it's so fun! I know, I know... childish right?? I don't care it's awesome!

I got my senior cap and gown pictures the day before yesterday. I don't like them but I'm going to purchase some because it's important to me to have a senior picture ahha...

I no longer have anything to talk about. I'ma go find something to do to pass away time in business law!